i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
