dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
