How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize