that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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