New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize