Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
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