Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
