I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
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