Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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