this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
