Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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