Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize