Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
