Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
