Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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