This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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