wat bout pragnant strippers??
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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