his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
