Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize