How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
a search helicopter?!
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
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