Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
