just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
