A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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