Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Randomize
