I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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