she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize