There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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