So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
