i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
