So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize