I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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