thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize