I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
My hand turned me down
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
