I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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