Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
