Fuck appropriateness.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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