I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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