Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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