I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
