Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
In other news, I just burned my penis
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I had to cum in my sink.
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