haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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