And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize