problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
