If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
should my penis look like a turkey
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
