I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
