I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
