im holly from the hills drunk
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
