There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
