bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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