This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize