It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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