I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
